I was unsure and had many questions when I started,
Unable to understand whether to hold on to those who departed.
I tried and any attempt to touch my past was futile,
As from behind the veil it waved at me with a “smile”.
In a failed attempt, I fought with my past in present,
An act that I would never consider to be decent.
I cried as I saw the past slip away, to which I was so attached,
It was a healing process and I thought I was being attacked.
I decided to quit the things that I was doing,
With tears in my eyes I tried a new beginning.
There was one more thing that I had still to let go,
The sense of I, me and mine, which they call the ego.
As I looked at the winding road up the hill,
Towards a destination I hadn’t started still.
It looked like I was a long long way away from my goal,
I decided to climb nonetheless and it started taking a toll.
Shivering while climbing as cold touched my bones,
On the roads I found freshly fallen pine cones.
The pine cones reminded something that I had chosen to forget,
That even those high up also fall and eventually turn to dust.
When hungry, I found fresh apples from a road side garden,
Tastier I am sure than the one had by Eve and Adam.
When I was thirsty I drank from a mountain spring,
A respite that only pure mountain water could bring.
It was the Almighty telling me to relax and not to worry,
And that I would be provided for and I need not be sorry.
The mountains and highlands that people called divine,
When I reached there, I was sure I would be fine.
The mountains were so big, and the snow so white,
And I told myself that the teachers were always right.
Mountains told me to accept that I was puny and the outcome I can’t influence,
I am not even a speck of dust, when it comes to the whole vast universe.
The snows told me that everything here is inherently pure,
And we pollute everything looking for useless cure.
When I came down from the mountains, I was not like when I went,
Left there many things I was attached to, for which I was sent.
I was questioned for the decisions I took and things I left behind,
I told them as long as this did good to me, I really didn’t mind.
Been a year since I came back from the mountains,
And the memory still as fresh as last night’s rains.
Looking back at last year, it all makes sense now,
The answers to my why, what, when and how.
In human terms, this journey has lasted only a year long,
Ode to the mountains and my evolution, this mountain song.
The poem was penned by me, where I have tried to put in to words my evolution from what I was a year back when I went to the Himalayas.
In frame: A temple by the mountain road high in the Himalayas, on the way from Naitala to Guptakashi, in Uttarakhand, India. I found these small temples dedicated to local Gods as well as such ritualistic things, common place in the Himalayas.
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© Amrit Panigrahy. All rights reserved.